In a Moment of Clarity, Gore Vidal Says He is Insane
HOLLYWOOD, CA – Yesterday Gore Vidal snapped out of his psychotic stupor, looked around him and asked for a glass of water. His aide brought him a glass of water and Vidal drank it. He then gave the glass back to his aide and looked at his reflection in a mirror on the wall opposite him. He was in his own home in the Hollywood Hills. When the aide returned from the kitchen Vidal asked him what year it was. The aide told him it was 2009. November, 2009.
Vidal clasped his hands together and looked at the aide.
“You do realize that I’m insane, don’t you?”
“Yes,” responded the aide.
“Good!” Vidal barked as he slumped in his wheel chair.
Vidal rubbed his hands together and pondered for a moment. He then looked up at the aide.
“I can’t believe people listen to the nonsense that I spit out! For the love of decency! After I drink an entire fifth of bourbon I say that I should have shot Bush! And the host agrees?”
“I’ve heard.” Said the aide.
“Why doesn’t somebody stop this? I’m eighty four years old! Why do they let me embarrass myself so?”
“Because you’re rich and you’re somewhat famous.”
“Somewhat?”
“Yeah, somewhat”
Vidal slumped in his chair and sighed.
“Yeah, and that somewhat ain’t gonna last much longer is it?”
“No, I doubt it.”
Vidal took a deep breath and looked around him.
“Have I done my George W Bush impersonation for you?”
“Many times.”
Vidal chuckled to himself and slumped further down in his wheel chair. When the aide saw that he was asleep, he wheeled him out to the deck that looked over the Hollywood Hills. The aide then went back into the house and stole some of Vidal’s silverware.
* As told to The Daily Rash by an anonymous source.
