ATLANTIC CITY – According to friends and relatives, Frank Sinatra Jr. is getting his house in order. Neighbors peer nervously through drawn curtains as gawking motorists slow to a crawl- hoping to catch a peek of Frank Sinatra’s only son. According to his gardener, ever since doctors told him that he was going to...
Read more »
LAS VEGAS – A confidential source inside the FBI says that they are investigating Chastity Bono, daughter of entertainers Sonny and Cher, for alleged connections to organized crime syndicates. The source said that Chastity Bono may hold a high position of power in the chain of command that comprises the families that rule organized...
Read more »
“I’d been hit several times by low flying birds. They seemed focused on me, not the other band members. So when I looked up and saw the largest pigeon hovering over me, I knew I was being targeted! The big bird hovered for a moment and then he turned his head and dipped into...
Read more »
WASHINGTON – After firing Stanley McChrystal and announcing at a White House press conference that he would be replacing him with General David Petraeus, President Obama retracted his statements an hour later on the Nancy Grace Show, saying he was instead going to nominate Gary Busey to replace Petraeus, who’d just replaced McChrystal. President...
Read more »
LOS ANGELES – As the bodies pile up at the city morgue and inner city alleyways, the residents of Los Angeles continue to celebrate their Lakers’ victory in the NBA championship against the Boston Celtics. Several cars continued to smolder as the sun rose following a night of raucous partying by a city that...
Read more »
NASHVILLE, TENNESSEE – Tipper Gore broke her silence this week and admitted that she and husband Al have indeed separated. In an interview with Vibe magazine, Tipper disclosed startling details of Al Gore’s predilection for kinky sex. According to the article, husband Al’s metamorphosis from political superstar to super-freak began fairly recently. “Al began...
Read more »
ORLANDO, FLORIDA – Officials at Disney World announced this afternoon that actor John Travolta was asked to leave the amusement park on Memorial Day after he jumped into the water of a theme ride and proceeded to urinate. When the incident occurred, holiday revelers ran towards Disney security team members as parents attempted to...
Read more »
PHOENIX, ARIZONA – Phoenix Police Chief Jack Harris confirmed today that Phoenix police officers have detained international singing sensation, Shakira. Sheriff Deputies pulled over Shakira’s limousine en route to Phoenix Sky Harbor Airport. Witnesses say that Shakira was shocked when the police politely asked her to remove herself from the limousine and to produce...
Read more »
KOSCIUSKO, MISSISSIPPI – Although scientists claim that it is impossible, Oprah Winfrey producers announced today that her childhood friends, Melinda and Sandy, two cockroaches she befriended while living in poverty as a child, were found alive last week in Mississippi. Cecil Baker lives down the street from the house where Oprah was raised in...
Read more »
HONOLULU, HAWAII – When Duane “Dog” Chapman appeared on the Tyra Banks Show yesterday, it was several minutes into the interview before Tyra noticed he only had one arm. Even then, she was unaware that Chapman had been in possession of both arms until just a few days before the taping. Duane “Dog” Chapman...
Read more »
