Daily Rash


Obama Chastises First Lady Over Unsightly Panty Lines

Obama Chastises First Lady Over Unsightly Panty Lines

WASHINGTON – In a rare display of harsh criticism, President Obama lambasted First Lady Michelle Obama as she and the presidential children were preparing to board Air Force One. When the President first arrived on the tarmac he was all smiles as he waved to press members and staff that had gathered to see...
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NY Times Calls Obama Bicycle Photos ‘Rugged Masculinity Gone Wild!’

NY Times Calls Obama Bicycle Photos ‘Rugged Masculinity Gone Wild!’

NEW YORK – In an editorial earlier this week the New York Times gushed over photographs of President Obama riding his bicycle at Martha’s Vinyard, at one point exclaiming the president was “an example of rugged masculinity gone wild!” The newspaper derided critics of the president, even suggesting that John Boehner and Karl Rove...
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Obama Welcomes America’s First Transgender Baby to White House

WASHINGTON – This afternoon top administration officials and celebrities joined President and Mrs. Obama in welcoming America’s first transgender baby to the White House. Eleven-month-old Hillary Rodham Carter is the youngest transgender to meet officially with a U.S. president. The president hosted a gender-neutral luncheon for the adorable transgender tot and its parents with...
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President Obama Awards Himself the Presidential Medal of Freedom

WASHINGTON – On Wednesday President Obama presented awards to seventeen honorees of the Presidential Medal of Freedom. The medal is the nation’s highest civilian honor, awarded for meritorious contributions to the security or national interests of the United States, to world peace, or to cultural or other significant public or private endeavors. After introducing...
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President Obama and North Korean Dictator Kim Jong-Un in Twitter Feud

WASHINGTON – Early this morning North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un took to his Twitter account and began a rash of disparaging taunts directed at President Barack Obama. After a year of clownish bravado from the young dictator that included nuclear threats, few were surprised that he would attempt to provoke the president with denigrating...
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Megyn Kelly Assaults Michelle Fields on Fox News

Michelle Fields, the woman who accused Donald Trump’s campaign manager of assaulting her, appeared on the Fox News channel today with host Megyn Kelly where she revealed for the first time the gruesome severity of her injuries. Following is a transcript of that interview which airs tonight on The Kelly File at 10:00 pm...
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Hillary Clinton Says Chelsea Erased Servers During Postpartum Depression

This afternoon Democratic presidential frontrunner, Hillary Clinton, appeared on MSNBC’s Hardball with host Chris Matthews to discuss the missing emails from her time as Secretary of State. Following is a transcript of that interview which airs at 6 pm tonight on MSNBC. CHRIS MATTHEWS:  Thank you for joining us today Madam Secretary. I also...
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Joe Biden Talks About the Pain of Birth in Confusing Labor Day Speech

PITTSBURGH — Joe Biden may not have announced his decision to run for president in his Labor Day speech to union workers on Monday, but the raucous applause and enthusiasm he received is more commonly reserved for presidential candidates, not second term vice presidents. As Biden stood on the stage soaking in the adoration...
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Joe Biden Calls Hillary Clinton the Yoko Ono of Politics

WASHINGTON  – After speaking to a group of seniors about shotgun ownership and voting rights at the Last Train to Clarksville nursing home in Bethesda this afternoon, Vice President Joe Biden appeared on MSNBC’s PoliticsNation with host, Al Sharpton. Sharpton asked the vice president pointed questions about Hillary Clinton, Biden’s own presidential aspirations and...
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John Travolta Urinates Outside at Disney World

ORLANDO, FLORIDA – A Disney World spokesperson announced this afternoon that actor John Travolta was asked to leave the amusement park Monday after he jumped into the water of a theme ride and proceeded to urinate. When the incident occurred Disney World revelers ran towards security team members as parents shielded the eyes of...
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