Politics

Joe Biden to Perform Dance Interpretation of Obama’s Job Speech

Joe Biden to Perform Dance Interpretation of Obama’s Job Speech

WASHINGTON – White House press secretary Jay Carney announced today that Vice President Joe Biden will be performing a dance interpretation of President Obama’s job speech during Thursday night’s address to the Joint Session of Congress. Carney said that Obama and Biden have been rehearsing their speech/dance performance at an undisclosed Washington D. C....
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Vice President Biden Mocks Ash Wednesday at Press Conference

WASHINGTON – In what many are calling cruel and insensitive, Vice President Joe Biden poked fun at Ash Wednesday this morning during a joint press conference with President Obama. Obama said afterward that he was not aware of “Joe’s antics” behind him as he spoke to reporters. As President Obama was responding to a...
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Joe Biden Doubtful Sarah Palin Acted Alone in Arizona Shootings

Joe Biden Doubtful Sarah Palin Acted Alone in Arizona Shootings

SLIDEL, LOUISIANA – Inside the sparsely populated community room of the Peaceful Twilight Convalescent Home, Vice President Joe Biden was concluding his three hour speech on health care to a mostly unconscious audience. Though there were four women in the back of the room who were alert and functioning, they were engaged in a...
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Emails Reveal Comedian Carrot Top a Secret CIA Experiment

Emails Reveal Comedian Carrot Top a Secret CIA Experiment

WASHINGTON – The Obama administration has been slow to respond to recent controversial government secrets revealed in the latest Wikileaks documents, namely the CIA’s top secret experimentation with Las Vegas entertainer Carrot Top. Emails reveal the extreme “unease” of several high ranking officials with regard to the CIA’s “Operation Carrot Top” project. In one...
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Stephen Colbert: Is This the House Judiciary Committee or an Oil Painting?

Stephen Colbert: Is This the House Judiciary Committee or an Oil Painting?

WASHINGTON –  In a congressional hearing room filled with reporters, photographers and members of the House Judiciary subcommittee, Texas Congresswoman Sheila Jackson Lee was playing her favorite game, Pigs A Pop’n, on her iPhone. Her periodic sighs of frustration with the game were muffled by the click of camera shutters, murmurs of confusion from...
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Koran Burning Pastor & Ground Zero Imam to Appear on Wife-Swap

Koran Burning Pastor & Ground Zero Imam to Appear on Wife-Swap

WASHINGTON – Vice President Joe Biden announced this morning that Florida Pastor Terry Jones and New York Imam Feisal Abdul Rauf have agreed to appear on the television show Wife-Swap. The vice president was all smiles as he explained that he was the one who approached the two controversial men about appearing on the...
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Vice President Biden Assaults Elderly Woman

MADISON, WISCONSIN –  Secret Service agents forcibly removed Vice President Joe Biden from a Democratic fund raiser in Madison yesterday after he brutally assaulted an elderly woman. When Margaret Millhouse told the vice president that she thought his administration was spending too much money, Biden leaned into the woman, prodded her with his finger...
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Obama: Blame for Oil Spill Falls On Joe Biden

WASHINGTON, DC – During his appearance last night on the Joy Behar Show, President Obama said that he is tired of taking the blame for everything and that it was time that his second in command started taking some of the heat. Obama reiterated what he’d said just hours earlier on The Maury Povich...
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Helen Thomas Confesses to Tyra Banks: ‘I Made Out With Hitler’

WASHINGTON, DC – In a shocking revelation during her 2010 appearance on 60 Minutes, former White House correspondent Helen Thomas told Tyra Banks that she once “made out” with Adolf Hitler. Tyra Banks, who’d recently been hired by 60 Minutes to handle foreign and domestic political coverage sat speechless after Thomas’ comment as the...
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A Drunk Joe Biden Rambles Incoherently at White House Picnic

WASHINGTON, DC – Vice President Joe Biden issued a press statement today from his bedroom at the Vice Presidential residence in Washington: “I want to apologize for my words and actions yesterday at the annual White House Family Picnic. I had a few too many… and from what I’ve been told, may have made...
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