President Obama and North Korean Dictator Kim Jong-Un in Twitter Feud

WASHINGTON – Early this morning North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un took to his Twitter account and began a rash of disparaging taunts directed at President Barack Obama. After a year of clownish bravado from the young dictator that included nuclear threats, few were surprised that he would attempt to provoke the president with denigrating remarks on the Internet’s popular social network. It all began around the time of Obama’s morning staff meeting when Kim Jong-Un sent out three consecutive tweets:

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
Obama gave me neck massage & clip toenails b4 cooking me waffles 4 breakfast 2 day.

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
Obama is my concubine. After my bath he bring me slippers and comb my hair.

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
I make President Obama wash my car after he change oil and rotate tires. #POTUS

Thirty minutes passed before Jong-Un’s next tweet:  

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
Obama shoot basketball like fat girl with greasy hands. #rosieodonnell

A few minutes later the Twitter world exploded when President Obama responded to the Korean dictator with a tweet from his own Twitter account:

President Obama @barackobama
Chubby dictator Kim Jong-Un certainly has gall to disparage the obese + apparently he’s sexist.  #bullies #rosieodonnell

Within seconds Kim Jong-Un shot back with another tweet at President Obama:

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
Girls laugh at Obama who shoot basketball like sissy who pee in pants. #justsayin

For the next several minutes the Twitter battle was on. Millions around the world sat glued to their computer screens watching the first ever cyber-war between the leaders of the United States and North Korea in 140 characters or less.

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun How bout u & me shooting a game of hoops? Or r u 2 afraid? #NBA #hoops #bball

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama You make 2 out of 22 shots on basketball court. What 2 b afraid of?

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  I had an off day. Even Dennis Rodman had off days. @DennisRodman #NBA

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama Dennis Rodman wear make-up and has metal spike in nose. Still he never miss 18 shots. Even when drunk. #NBA @DennisRodman

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  Just admit it, u r 2 afraid 2 shoot hoops with me. #POTUS

Kim Jong-un @dictator
@barackobama  I will play game of horse with u then ride u like a horse to Waffle House.

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  I don’t understand Waffle House reference. #justsayin

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama Should I speak more slowly? I …. will …. ride ….. u ….. like…. horse …. 2 …. Waffle …. House.

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  Very funny. Almost as funny as ur haircut, Kim. #supercuts

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama That’s Mr. Un to you, paper doll.

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  LOL! Paper doll?

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama *looking around* Is there echo in here?

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  Everything is just a big joke 2 u isn’t it? Nuclear war, oppressing ur people. All a big joke. #LMFAO

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama  We talking about Joe *foot n mouth* Biden now? #gaffe

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  No we r not.

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama  Then I confuse. I thought you say big joke. #ROFLMAO

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun I guess that passes 4 humor in ur miserable little country.

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama  You may cook me more waffles b4 I obliterate ur country, Mr. Barry. #justsayin

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun I have sent war ships 2 ur country & will obliterate u back. May b u forget I killed Osama bin Laden? #OBL #POTUS #assasination

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama  Osama bin Laden was my bearded bitch. I will destroy ur war ships & make u water my lawn wearing dress. #OBL #dictator #landscaping

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun  I will not wear a dress 4 u. Do u have any last requests b4 I destroy u? #tranny #a-bomb

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama U will wear bonnet and sing North Korean lullaby when u exfoliate my face. Then I destroy u.

President Obama @barackobama
@kimjongun Gotta run, Kim. Florence Henderson singing at W.H. tonite. May b Dennis Rodman will come over 2 play with u again. #BradyBunch

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama I will push red button. When I push button Florence Henderson go boom! #mushroomcloud

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama If u bring corn dogs & pull me n rickshaw 2 cockfights I won’t push red button till next Tuesday. #diplomacy

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama  Hello?

Kim Jong-Un @dictator
@barackobama  Barry?

At this afternoon’s White House press briefing, Jay Carney said the administration’s main concern today was the gun control bill before congress and that he would not be responding to questions about Obama’s Twitter battle with Kim Jong-Un.

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