News

NY Times Calls Obama Bicycle Photos ‘Rugged Masculinity Gone Wild!’

NEW YORK – In an editorial earlier this week the New York Times gushed over photographs of President Obama riding his bicycle at Martha’s Vineyard, at one point exclaiming the president was an example of “rugged masculinity gone wild!” The newspaper derided critics of the president, even suggesting that John Boehner or Karl Rove...
Read Story »

Obama Welcomes America’s First Transgender Baby to White House

WASHINGTON – This afternoon top administration officials and celebrities joined President and Mrs. Obama in welcoming America’s first transgender baby to the White House. Eleven-month-old Hillary Rodham Carter is the youngest transgender to meet officially with a U.S. president. The president hosted a gender-neutral luncheon for the adorable transgender tot and its parents with...
Read Story »

O. J. Simpson Endorses Hillary Clinton

LOVELOCK, NEVADA – This morning Al Sharpton interviewed O. J. Simpson at the Lovelock prison in Nevada where Simpson is serving up to 33 years for robbing a man in a Las Vegas hotel. Following is the transcript of the interview that will air Sunday morning on MSNBC’s PoliticsNation. AL SHARPTON:  Thank you for...
Read Story »

Megyn Kelly Assaults Michelle Fields on Fox News

Michelle Fields, the woman who accused Donald Trump’s campaign manager of assaulting her, appeared on the Fox News channel today with host Megyn Kelly where she revealed for the first time the gruesome severity of her injuries. Following is a transcript of that interview which airs tonight on The Kelly File at 10:00 pm...
Read Story »

Nancy Pelosi Urges Redskins Owner to Change Name to Washington Potatoes

During her speech at a nursing home this afternoon, Nancy Pelosi called on the owner of the Washington Redskins to change the team name to the Washington Potatoes.
Read Story »

Large Naked Pedophile Picnics Outside Chuck E. Cheese Restaurant

BEAVERTON, OREGON – Rod Sterling has been the assistant manager of Beaverton’s Chuck E. Cheese restaurant for eleven years. He’s had to deal with surly children, spilled drinks and crying toddlers. He’s helped burp babies, break up fights and calm impatient mothers. But for all his experiences in his eleven years as a Chuck...
Read Story »

Brian Williams Apologizes to Reverend Al Sharpton for Misremembering

This afternoon Brian Williams sat down with Rev. Al Sharpton for his first interview since NBC suspended him for fabricating stories. Following is the transcript of that conversation that can be seen tonight on Sharpton’s show, PoliticsNation, at 6:00 pm on MSNBC. AL SHARPTON: Welcome to my show on MSNBC where I host. BRIAN...
Read Story »

Sting Admits to Decades Long Love Affair with Himself

LOS ANGELES – International rock star and celebrity Gordon Sumner, better known around the world as Sting, admitted on the Tyra Banks Show last week that for the past several decades he’s been having an affair with himself. Audience members gasped, some even running from the studio holding their stomachs. One woman said that...
Read Story »

Obama and Kim Jong-Un Twitter Feud

WASHINGTON – Early this morning North Korean dictator Kim Jong-Un took to his Twitter account and began a rash of disparaging taunts directed at President Barack Obama. After a year of clownish bravado from the young dictator that included nuclear threats, few were surprised that he would attempt to provoke the president with denigrating...
Read Story »

Michelle Obama Proposes Slaughtering Obese Children

LAS VEGAS – This weekend First Lady Michelle Obama spoke at a gathering of physicians and nutritionists at a Childhood Obesity forum at the Bellagio hotel. Sporting a sleeveless garment that allowed her toned arms to mesmerize awestruck attendees, the first lady regaled her admirers as physically fit waitstaff served healthy hors d’oeuvres and...
Read Story »